"It appears as if The Birds is working on a deeper metaphorical level, the film starts with Melanie in a bird shop and ends with people locking themselves up in their homes choosing to force themselves into a cage..." GREAT observation, Peta-gaye! :D
Okay - just a few pointers; in a number of your reviews now, you critique the film poster, which I find a bit odd. The film poster might be a good source of content, but not always; it feels a bit mechanical - like a formula. Just because you're asked to include the film poster (which prefaces the review) doesn't mean you have to derive content from it. Likewise, I know that the 'what XXX appears to be saying' is one of the suggested ways you can respond to a quote, but you're using this structure EVERY time you use a quote, and it's reads very robotically. The point is that you 'use' your quotes and reflect on them when you use them - you could and should find alternate ways to react to your quotes in terms of your writing style. Try and relax a bit now, Peta-gaye - you've understood the principles of academic writing, now freestyle a bit so you can develop a formal, but natural style.
"It appears as if The Birds is working on a deeper metaphorical level, the film starts with Melanie in a bird shop and ends with people locking themselves up in their homes choosing to force themselves into a cage..." GREAT observation, Peta-gaye! :D
ReplyDeleteOkay - just a few pointers; in a number of your reviews now, you critique the film poster, which I find a bit odd. The film poster might be a good source of content, but not always; it feels a bit mechanical - like a formula. Just because you're asked to include the film poster (which prefaces the review) doesn't mean you have to derive content from it. Likewise, I know that the 'what XXX appears to be saying' is one of the suggested ways you can respond to a quote, but you're using this structure EVERY time you use a quote, and it's reads very robotically. The point is that you 'use' your quotes and reflect on them when you use them - you could and should find alternate ways to react to your quotes in terms of your writing style. Try and relax a bit now, Peta-gaye - you've understood the principles of academic writing, now freestyle a bit so you can develop a formal, but natural style.